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One of the exercises in CLP is about identifying and clarifying our personal values. We each identify our top five values, writing one each on five index cards. Then we have to drop one, and another… until we are left holding the card with our number one, top value. What is your current One right now and why?
I would say that my top value right now is my faith. My faith in God reflects in the way I behave and carry myself, the way I love and treat others, and also in the way I serve others — both in my personal life and throughout my work.
Has that always been true for you, were you raised in a religious family?
It hasn’t always been true for me.
I was born in Ponce, Puerto Rico almost 46 years ago and was raised between Puerto Rico and Dominican Republic. God was always present, because we went to Catholic and Episcopal schools — although we weren’t either — and because my grandparents would take us to church every Sunday. As a teenager and young adult, my faith and my relationship with God was barely existent; but my desire to help and be of service has always been there.
When did you find your way to Connecticut?
I moved to Connecticut in 2005, living in several places across the state. Four and a half years ago, I moved to Virginia to work in the Early Childhood Education arena with the state.
What is one big, burning leadership question you are wrestling with these days?
I think that the first question that comes to mind is, why do people try to push their points of view, values, and ideas onto others? We should be able to agree to disagree and learn how to respect and love each other even when we don’t see eye to eye. Just because we don’t think alike, that doesn’t make me a racist, a bigot or a bad person.
Would you like to say more? I’m curious about the context of that, and if it has emerged recently, or has been true historically for you.
It has been a theme that has emerged in the last maybe six or seven years. The context I would say it is both political and cross-cultural. I just noticed that there has been a growth in anger and hatred amongst people nowadays, just because they think different, have different values, or different political views.
What inspires you, gives you hope these days?
My niece and nephews; their unconditional love, their innocence and their eagerness to learn.
The oldest one — Lucas José — will be 14 in September. Then comes Catalina Sofía, who will be three in September as well. Last but definitely not least, comes Gael Nicolás who is a year old.
Lucas lives in Virginia where I am, so I get to see him a lot — every other weekend, and sometimes throughout the week. Catalina and Gael live in Connecticut, and I try to go see them two to three times a year; and I video call them twice a week.
I want to be able to make a difference in their lives, and help them grow to be loving, caring and successful human beings.
Are there certain activities or types of things you like to do together?
With Lucas we watch movies and videos, get pizza and just chill at my apartment. With Catalina and Gael, we have gone to the Children’s Museum and the Aquarium; we spend time with the whole family when I come see them. During our video calls, we just “talk” and sing nursery rhymes.
This work of transformational change is hard. Stepping in, stepping up, over time, can be draining – physically, intellectually, emotionally, psychically, spiritually. How do you recharge, restore, take care of yourself, rekindle your fire?
To me, the best way to recharge myself is being around my family, spending quality time with my parents, siblings and their families, and my niece and nephews, as well as my significant other. They are all at the core of anything I do.
Have you always been a close family? What kinds of things do you do together?
Yes, we have always been a very close knit family. My sister Lizbeth and I are about one and a half years apart, and then 10 years after she was born came my brother Edgardo. We like to go to the movies, play card games, go out to try different restaurants, and we talk to each other a few times a week.
We have been there for each other through thick and thin. Both my siblings are married and I have been blessed to have an amazing relationship with both my brother and sister-in-law.
Speaking of people you are close with, would you please introduce us to someone you are/were close with personally (e.g., family, teacher, friend, mentor), who shaped (or shapes) you and how you view leadership and possibility for a better community/world?
Someone that has shaped and is still shaping my view on leadership has been Rev. Syrette Green, the owner of Wellsprings Counseling Services in Connecticut.
Interesting enough, I met Syrette right after I finished the second retreat for the CLP cohort. During one of the activities we did at the retreat, some things came up from my childhood, some trauma I had basically blocked out from my memories. This situation made me search for help of a therapist, and my best friend’s twin gave me Syrette’s information.
I reached out to her, made an appointment and started seeing her on a weekly basis.
She has guided me through some really hard times. She has helped me in working through my trauma, to heal and to forgive as part of my healing process.
Her therapy is God based and centered. She has helped me understand and see the doors God has been opening for me, and all His blessings. She has been guiding me to see and understand what God has in store for me, and what his purpose is for me.
She has helped me grow, and I am forever grateful for meeting her when I did. Throughout the years she has become much more than just my therapist; she has become like a spiritual mother for me.
What do you recommend to us, in each of these categories:
- Reading – Cuando Era Puertorriqueña by Esmeralda Santiago; it is available in English: When I was Puerto Rican
- Listening – “El Wanabi” or “Boricua en la Luna” by Fiel a La Vega, a Puerto Rican rock band
- Eating – Pastelon de Platanos, like a lasagna with sweet plantains. What was the weirdest food you’ve ever eaten? Mine was actually in Alabama, some co-workers and I went to a conference, and we stepped out for lunch. We went to a Moon Pie store which had a small diner in it with some weird things on the menu. One of my co-workers and I decided to get the weirdest thing on the menu, which was a double hamburger patty, with melted cheese, bacon, and caramelized onions in between two chocolate moon pies instead of hamburger buns. To this day my co-worker can’t even think of it without getting sick.
- Watching – The Chosen
- Laughing – John Crist or Matt Rife
- Wildcard – (your choice) – Faith. My journey with my faith hasn’t always been consistent; during my early young adult years, I really didn’t want to do anything with God, I was very angry. When I turned 21 I got really, really sick — to the point I spent quite some time in ICU, and the doctors told my family to say their goodbyes because I was not making it out. My parents brought a family friend who is a pastor; she used an anointed oil and prayed over me. As she prayed, I felt this presence on the other side; and after she left, that presence stayed with me. Right after that, my health took a turn for the better, I was able to get the surgery I needed and was moved out of ICU. A few days after I was back home with my loved ones. Since that moment, God has been walking next to me, guiding me or even carrying me through different stages in my life. I am so thankful and blessed for all that He has done for me.
Interview with The Circle’s Creative Director & Editor, Lara Herscovitch (Cohort 10). To reach Lara directly: thecircle@clpnewhaven.org or Lara@LaraHerscovitch.com
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